A real conversation

My friend: You’re going to tell me I’m crazy… but I like men older than me 
Me: Hahaha! Don’t worry, so do I.
My friend: I have such a crush on that 25 year old in my class… 
Me: …
My friend: … what?
Me: nothing… I thought you meant… you know… Men quite a bit more older than 25
My friend: you mean like 30 years old? Hahahah! No! That’s weird! Wait… do you like men older than 30? 

Me: well… 


… *awkardly leaves* 

Guess who’s got two cupboards in her room. Now, guess who’s going to sleep in the sofa.

That awkward moment when your son was never born because your wife can’t have kids.